I wasn’t even aware of its existence until it came in my house far too early in the morning, clutching the end of my daughter’s finger like a grubby toddler holding on to a sucker.
“Mom! Look what Dad found last night when he was watering the grass! He put it in the bug box for us so we could look at it!” “It” was an enormous grasshopper, green as Kermit the Frog with none of Kermit’s appeal, and I wanted it out of my bedroom. Thankfully all it took was a grimace from me, and off went my little band of entomologists.
A minute later my 5 year-old returned, a bit awed and flabbergasted. Apparently when the grasshopper had taken flight in the direction of a hedge in our neighbor’s front yard, a mockingbird spied it, and gave chase. A second after the grasshopper took refuge in the hedge, the mockingbird stuck its head in, grabbed it, and had breakfast. Blech…talk about wild kingdom.
That quickly my attitude toward the grasshopper reversed. A minute before, I had wanted it gone…now I just felt badly for it.
Probably says more about me than about the grasshopper, though.
Lately, life has just felt like that. I get out of one scrape just to get clobbered by whatever it is that’s coming around the corner. I know that God loves me, that He has given me all I need in Christ, and that I am blessed beyond measure… but often I just feel rejected, abandoned, and beat up.
So this summer I’m challenging myself to remember that my feelings don’t always reflect the truth about my life. I want to (again) learn to consistently and intentionally bathe myself with Scripture so the truths there imbed themselves in my mind and heart. I must give my feelings, so fragile and unsteady, an anchor in something outside myself and my circumstances. My goal is to remember that if I will wait upon the Lord, I’m promised something that’s compared to flying like an eagle, not being breakfast for a mockingbird. Amen to that…
First of all, I am SO glad that you are writing again, Shannon. I loved reading Messy Everyday Wonder, and I SO resonated with this post.
ReplyDeleteSecondly, AMEN. I feel the challenge to re-learn scripture, and let it affect me (instead of treating it like an acquaintance I knew in high school - we were buddies then, but now? Polite. Familiar. Distant.), inspire me, and be changed by it.
I'm sad that you feel pummeled, but I think it's a sign of maturity that you would face it with God's Word. It's like when David wrote psalms that declared "I WILL praise the Lord." He directed himself toward the good and holy (perhaps despite his feelings?), and God met him.
Sharifa! Thank you - you always lift my head. Thank you for identifying with me - it is SO good to walk thru these things with you!
ReplyDelete