Last week…..was crazy. Not just a little crazy, but CUH-RAZY, with a lot of heartbreak and exhaustion thrown in. But FRIDAY was coming…with a great big gift of 2 whole hours in the morning all to myself, hanging out with some fabulous women, getting to hear a fantastic speaker, while the children were safely tucked away in childcare. I was a little giddy.
But giddy quickly turned to grumpy, because the speaker (for me) was a punch in the gut dressed in pink. Hear me, I don’t think it was her intent to discourage…she meant to motivate. But here are a few of the things I heard, and the way my thought process interacted:
We were married for 35 years and had only had 5 fights (we had that many yesterday).
Don’t ever wear shorts & t-shirts to bed, because he needs to be reminded that you’re not just one of the guys (I think he’s aware, even if I crawl in bed in a paper bag).
Be sure to keep the pounds off, because he notices those things (and I don’t?).
And it was all backed up with Scripture…it felt like the Word handled in such a way that it was thoughtlessly slicing me to pieces, instead of surgically removing the way Hebrews 4:12-13 has in mind (thank you for planting that image in my brain, Sharifa!). I had to leave early. It was just making me cranky.
A good reminder for this chica that WORDS count. They mean something.
Had the chance to visit with my first grader’s teacher this week. She asked us to help Kitty with her words…because her “big sister” role was showing with the other kids in the class. “She just has the tendency to be harsh when something needs to be corrected.” SIGH. “She’s just doing what she sees her mother doing,” I managed to convey to the teacher, anguished once again that (in addition to handing down their sin nature) I model many specific sins very clearly for my kids on a daily basis. (I did get a BIG hug from her teacher at this confession, and real encouragement).
So, a reminder. Words count. BIG. Proverbs talks about the fact that our words can heal, or destroy. I Corinthians reminds us that, even if we have the most beautiful, most thoughtful, most excellent things to say, if they are said without love, they’re just NOISE. The old sticks & stones adage – it’s garbage. Words cut…they bruise…and they can ruin perfectly good weekends.
Oh, the power of words. I feel like my face is plastered on the pages of the book of James that talk about the unbridled tongue.
ReplyDeleteEphesians 4:29 is a verse that I - on my good days - utter to myself when I'm stewing on how to answer someone. And these days, my best defense has been silence.
I am amazed at a couple that doesn't fight more than 5 times in a 35-year marriage. Praise God for that. That's not my story, but praise God that it's theirs.
I think that this is why it is so important that we ALSO open our mouths, type, send smoke signals about OUR experiences and our journeys of faith; so that we can encourage the Body as well. You do that for me! Thanks, Shannon.
{Oh - and what's the scripture reference for wives not wearing shorts and a t-shirt to bed?)